25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,
26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,
27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless.
28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself;
29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church,
30 because we are members of His body.
31 FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THaE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH.
32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church.
33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.
Vs. 25 - “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, “
“Husbands, love your wives” - This doesn’t seem like a big stretch as a command. I suppose it is possible that man might not love his wife, even in a Christian home. Love between married couples is shown throughout the Bible (Abraham and Sarah, Isaac and Rebekah, Jocob and Rachel). These two commands - wives submit to your husbands, and husbands are tied together both here (5:23-24) and in Col 3:18-19.
Why do husbands need to be reminded to love their wives? I suspect it is because men tend to think in terms of power and position and control. We need to be reminded that it the self-sacrificing love, like Jesus showed us when he gave Himself up for us, that is to be lived out in our marriage to our wives. God has not given us “a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of self-control.” (2 Tim 1:7)
Emotional affection, love, for your wife is not the point here. The point being made is in the next phrase...
“Just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her” - We might ponder how He could love the church before the church began? But, then, we are thinking in finite temporal situations. God is not limited by time, Jesus is infinite, outside of time. Of course He knew of the church, those who believe and worship Him, ‘before’ His death and resurrection. But, again, that’s not the important point.
He loved us and voluntarily died in our place. This is not romantic love, a movie love story, not boy-friend-girl-friend love. This is “Medal of Honor” type sacrifice, where a life is given to protect and save others. We do not deserve nor have we earned this sacrifice.
“God demonstrates His love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Rom. 5:8)
“God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.” (2 Cor 5:21)
“This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters.” (1 John 3:16 ).
“This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.” (1 John 4:9-10)
See also: (Rom. 8:34; 2 Cor. 5:15; 1 Pet 3:18)
Vs. 26 - “so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, “
“so that He might sanctify her” - The “so that” in this verse refers to the “Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her” above in verse 25. The reason Christ died on the cross and was resurrected was to provide salvation (sanctification) to the world. The offer is made to all. Unfortunately not all will believe. Fortunately, grace abounds to all who do believe and accept Jesus as Savior. Jesus takes sinful imperfect people and by His shed blood cleanses us of sin - i.e., sanctifies us.
The Unger Bible Dictionary has the following regarding ‘sanctification’ - The dominant idea of sanctification is separation from the secular and sinful, and setting apart for a sacred purpose. In the OT, things, places, times, people were sanctified, i.e., consecrated to holy purposes - usually only in a ceremonial and legal sense, to remind the Jews of the need for spiritual cleansing and the grace of God. In the NT, people are called to consecrate themselves to God, that is the inward cleansing work of God and Holy Spirit.
The church is set apart and cleansed by Christ’s sacrifice, and the work of God and the Holy Spirit. This is an important concept - cleansing is made available to all, but not all will derive any benefit. We are sinful creatures, and totally unsuitable to be in God’s holy presence. Christ’s death makes us acceptable and holy.
The image of the church as a bride is powerful. Look back to Genesis 2:18-24 in which man and woman are designed for each other. Eve is ‘presented’ to Adam (who had been alone) and Adam is blown away. The song (Gen 3:23) is Adam saying, “Wow!” God confirms that we are designed for each other in verse 24. The idea of the wife being pure and virginal at the time of marriage is found throughout the OT. However, just as about everything else, we have cheapened and demeaned the idea of marriage. God has not changed His view of marriage, we have changed our attitudes. God shows marriage is of adoration and love in “The Song of Songs”. The bride is bathed and pure, cleansed and waiting eagerly, is sequestered waiting for the arrival of her husband-to-be. They meet and are filled with joy.
“Having cleansed her” - Sanctification is spiritual cleansing, spiritual separation from the secular and sinful. Christ sanctifies the believers - we are cleansed by His shed blood. “But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.” (1 John 1:7) His blood purifies us. As normal human beings we are by nature impure, inherited from Adam - it is our spiritual DNA, it is built in from conception. There is no vaccine we can create that will change our sin nature. Unless we are perfect, as He is perfect, we have no place in His kingdom. Money, fame, glory - none of these things will make us perfect. Only Jesus blood and His righteousness can do that.
Vs. 27 - “that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. “
“That He might present to Himself the church” - This is another “So that”, linking the cleansing and sanctification to this act - The church and the Savior come together as bride and bridegroom to be joined together in marriage. Again, the images from The Song of Songs show the bride waiting expectantly, eagerly and the groom filled with anticipation. They meet and are overwhelmed with love for each other! This is not about a Justice-of-the-Peace over-the-counter marriage. This is even more than wedding in a garden, or a church. (We have seen several English royal weddings - they are nothing compared to this!)
The God of the Universe has given Himself to save and purify His believers. He is now waiting patiently for us. The perfect groom will be presented to the perfected bride. We are His, and acceptable to Him because what He has done! The Day is coming when the Savior and the Believers will be together. We who are many will be One with Him. We will see Him as He is, because we will be just like Him!
“in all her glory” - There are times when I do not feel all that glorious. I believe that God’s word is true, and it says that the church will be ‘glorious’, therefore I will also be glorious. I know that I do not have to generate that. Christ has done it for me - Praise to His Glory!
“But that she should be holy and blameless.” - The Bride will be holy and blameless - the basic definition of sanctified. Me - holy and blameless! “For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.” (1 Pet 1:18-19) You - holy and blameless! (See: Jude 24,25; 1 Thess 3:13; Col 1:22; 2 Cor 5:21).
Vs. 28 - “So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; “
“Love their own wives as their own bodies” - This is not about possessing the wife as your own. Very few of us do not love and respect our own bodies - that is, to protect our physical selves from danger, harm, and death. We will feed it, clean it, care for its wounds, do what it takes to get healed. We know this is the only body we can have here on earth. If we don’t take care of it, we die.
Husbands, take care of your wife with the same care as you take care of yourself. Protect her from physical harm. Protect her from emotional harm. Do nothing that will lead her into spiritual harm. She is as important to you as is your own body. God brought Adam and Eve together (Gen 2:15-25). God knows men and women need each other - “It is not good for the man to be alone”.
Vs. 29-30 - “for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of His body.”
“Nourishes and cherishes” - God planned for man and woman to be together and live as one entity - “They shall become one flesh.” Treating your wife with any less respect than you treat yourself means you are going against the blueprint that God the Father has laid out.
“just as Christ also does the church” - Wow! Husbands, treat your wife like Christ treats the church! Christ voluntarily came from heaven to live as a human. He gave His life on the cross as the perfect sacrifice for the sin of the world. That is all of the sin of all of the world for all of time. The price to redeem every human who has ever lived has been paid.
Now, the sad (or bad) news. Not everyone will be saved. (See: 1 Tim 1:16)
“we are members of His body” - There are several images in the New Testament about the relationship of the believers and Christ: church, body, bride, temple. Each of these words are used many times (most of them in a normal non-metaphorical sense) in the NT. For example “church” is used about 77 times; seven of which refer to Christ.
For example: we the church are a holy people (1 Cor 1:2); Jesus is the head over everything of the church (Eph 1:22); He is the head of the body, the church (Col 1:18, 24); the church is God’s household (1 Tim 3:16). The church is seen as the Bride of Christ (See: John 3:29, Rev 19:2, Rev 21:2, 9, 22:17).
The church is said to be the body of Christ - about 16 times in NT - (See: Rom 12:4-5; 1 Cor 12:12-17; Eph 1:23; Col 1:18; Heb 3:13, etc.)
We are the temple for Christ (See: 1 Cor 3:15-17, 1 Cor 6:19, 2 Cor 6:16, Eph 2:12). Interestingly, in heaven there will be not temple structure, because God Himself will be the temple - we will worship Him because we will be in Him and He will be in us! (Rev 21:22).
“you also, as living stones, are being built up as a spiritual house for a holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.” (1 Pet 2:5 )
Vs. 31 - “FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH. “ (Quoted from Gen 2:25.)
The church is the Bride of Christ (See: John 3:29; Rev 19:2, 21:2, 9, 22:17). The church, the body of believers, will be ‘presented’ to the bridegroom - in your mind picture a royal wedding - the bride in a gorgeous white gown, signifying purity (holiness), being presented to the groom, the Holy One who died for her salvation, before the presence of God, to be joined together as one, and never, ever separated for eternity! The bride and groom are presented to each other, God the Father in all His glory handing us to Jesus Christ in all His glory. We have been made holy because of what He has done. We are His own. He is our own. (See also: John 14:20; 15:4; 17:9, 21, 23).
Vs. 32 - “This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. “
“This mystery is great” - This message is a mystery in this sense: Moses or the prophets did not speak or write about the ‘church’. There are no references to the church in the OT. The body of believers is identified as the church after Peter’s “Great Confession” (Matt 16:13-20). How does one become a ‘member’ of Christ’s church? By believing and confessing that “Jesus is the Christ, the Son of the Living God.” Who do you say that Jesus is? If you read or hear the testimony, the evidence of what He did. If you hear and believe in Him as Lord and Savior, He will acknowledge you as His own. He will give you the Holy Spirit as earnest guarantee He will return for you that you may be with Him in eternity.
It is not a mystery “Who Done It” novel. But it has been revealed at the proper time, for our benefit. The prophets did not predict this. They knew and believed that God would prevail and Israel would be saved. But just HOW it was to happen was not understood until after His resurrection, after He appeared to the disciples, after the Holy Spirit came upon them at Pentecost. If we look back at the Old Testament scripture we can see hints and allegations - but we have the benefit of hindsight. The Pharisees and Sadducees did not have Jesus crucified, sentenced to this humiliating death because they were anxious to see Jesus resurrected! They had Him killed to get rid of Him.
Vs. 33 - “Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.”
“Nevertheless” - Paul is not saying “In spite of everything I just said...” The example of Christ loving His body the church is intensely spiritual, and applies to us all. But to get down to practicalities: So, to sum up: Husbands - love your wife with the same intensity as you love yourself. Simple, huh?
“wife must see to it that she respects her husband” - The other side of the man/wife relationship.
“I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church” - If the resurrection of Jesus and His ascension into heaven was a great mystery, only revealed as it happened, then the believers being empowered by the Holy Spirit was equally amazing!
How do we apply the principles stated above?
Men love the idea that they are to be respected! That’s how they want the marriage to operate.
Women love the idea the husbands are love the wife unconditionally. That’s how they want the marriage to function.
We are plotting with these attitudes how the partners should behave and react, not on how we should conduct our own lives and behavior. We are very concerned that our partner is doing what God instructed them to do for us, but take a 'side-eye' at what He requires in our Christian life. Remember, Jesus rebuked Peter; telling him not to be concerned the 'other guy', but to follow Him. Don't be concerned about your wife or your husband. Be aware that Jesus has commanded you, and you are to obey Him. You will not be judged on someone else's behavior, only on your own!
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